CMoon (* (cmoongoddess) wrote in shobudo,
CMoon (*

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How can I prevent my ship from being smashed upon the rocks?

I am happy to report that I have found my center again...don't worry...I'm certain I will lose it soon enough. I had horrible nightmares all last night. One such dream involved being trapped in a house. When I finally got out, I was staring at the front of the house, yet, I still had the Venetian blinds in front of my eyes. It was as though my body had left the house, but my consciousness was still inside!

I interpret houses, within the context of dreams, as being states of consciousness . Apparently I am still in transition...but this dream reminded me that part of me (or perhaps even the real me) can be identified as "the watcher". The part of my consciousness that witnesses reality (or dreams) like a movie.

So...back to center...I practiced my moving meditation this afternoon. This usually involves a 45 minute hike and staying present. Sounds easy, but just try to keep your mind present in the moment for ANY length of time. The mind is like a 3 year gets bored very easily and wont sit still. Or, as the Buddhists put it. The mind is like an Ox, given free reign it likes to roll around in mud puddles!

Upon returning from said hike, I sat in meditation for 15 minutes or so...focused on breathing...stayed present...found center. Now, if I can somehow keep my center during the rest of my day tomorrow...but that is the problem isn't it?

I really like what has been said about us HAVING emotions and thoughts. That these things are like the waves of the ocean and we are not the waves. I totally can I prevent my ship from being smashed upon the rocks? Perhaps this is not possible...maybe I simply need to stop identifying with the ship so heavily...hmmm.

I think I will try a longer meditation in the morning. I usually only take 5 minutes...tomorrow I will try 15...we'll see what happens. C (*
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